Evil Lurks Within Us
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Friday Fictioneers
Tom needs a little shove out a upper story window… just saying.
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I think you are right Brenda! 🙂 Thank you for stopping by and reading my blog!
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Thanks so much for linking up with Trifecta. I’m giggling at Brenda W, but I’m agreeing with her all the way. I kind of want to yell at both of them. Good work with the prompt this week! Hope you’ll come back for the weekend challenge.
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Thank you! Yes Brenda W is right! Thank you for reading!
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Hehehe…I like how Brenda thinks 🙂 Tom does sound like a real jerk. I was wondering why she needed a nurse when her husband was still around and appeared to be perfectly mobile, but your last lines cleared that up.
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Yep Janna, Tom is not a nice guy at all. Definitely not up for husband of the year. I would want my freedom as well. Thank you for stopping by! 🙂
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Here’s to hoping she gets her freedom! Nice job tying the two prompts together into a great response. I wonder why he’s not in trouble for his actions that put her into the wheelchair?
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Thanks! These two prompts went together fairly easy. That may not be the case every week. At the moment she is thinking he “accidentally” pushed her down the stairs. Not sure where it is going yet.
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Oh how awful for her that she’s staying with someone who did such harm to her. And I have a sinking suspicion that her nurse may not be all she seems.
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Ahh Angela you are right in your suspicions! Although that wasn’t my original plan, but as I wrote things seemed to take on a mind of their own. 🙂 Thank you for reading and stopping by!
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Egad! Another great entry. Starting to feel a little scarred for Mary.
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Thanks! Mary is kind of helpless right now! Thank you for stopping by!
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Nicely done! My only concrit is extremely minor. Most of this post is cerebral in nature and told in a passive voice. This isn’t an evil thing, but consider flipping to an active voice. Look for all the “had” and “was” in the post, and try to rephrase. “Susan was usually good company. Although lately it seemed to be taking her longer and longer to answer the call button.” becomes “Usually good company, Susan lately took longer and longer to answer the call button.”
Just a thought.
I love the premise to the scene, and I agree that Tom should take a fall from an open window thirty stories up.
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Thank you Shelton. Note taken on the active and passive voice although this is something I just recently became familiar with and definitely need to practice. Thirty stories up, flat as a pancake! 🙂
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After receiving your note saying you had read my Writing on the Edge challenge prompt for this week, I went right to yours. Of course it intrigued me and I went back and read part 1. The story lets me imagine all sorts of events that may have happened before “part 1” and what may happen in the future. The suspense will keep us reading. Great job putting the two prompts together. I will follow your blog, and hope you will consider reading some more of my entries and following me as well. Best wishes, beebeesworld
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Thank you! I am following your blog now. This story is complete now for this blog. 8 parts whew! I am thinking about fleshing it out for either for a longer story or maybe even a novel. I can see this happening. It is probably the first thing that I wrote that was even anywhere near being expanded into a possible book. I can see my “Complications” also possibly being expanded. I am glad to see that my creativity is coming back and that I have finally got over my fear of letting people read what I write. Thank you so much for stopping by and reading.
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