FRIDAY FICTION with RONOVAN WRITES Prompt Challenge #4 – Judy and John – The Hospital Under Siege – Part 4

Friday Fiction with Ronovancouple-983961_1920 (2)ambulances-641458_1920 (2)Judy and John – The Hospital Under Siege – Part 4

written by Teresa Smeigh

copyright December 2015

The ambulance eased over the bumpy ground. Once on the paved road sirens blared, and they sped toward Bush Mills Regional Hospital.

“John, wha—”

Joan placed a hand on Judy’s arm. “We can’t talk here.” Joan’s eyes went to the paramedic.

Judy cried and held her husband’s hand, his eyes closed against the pain from the gunshot wound. There was silence for the remainder of the trip.

At the hospital, John was transferred to a private area of the E.R. Judy stayed with him while Joan left to find her husband.

Hospital staff examined John and Judy went to the waiting area. She sat, rested her head against the wall, and stared into space.

“Mrs. Burns?” Judy looked.

“Yes?”

“I’m Doctor Jeffries. Your husband has stabilized and will be in surgery soon. Everything should be fine, but I thought you might want to speak to him for a moment.” The smile and voice were sincere.

At John’s E.R. area, Dr. Jeffries nodded and left the couple alone.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were a Lieutenant in a special unit? Why did I have to find out this way? I could have lost you.” So much for honesty.

“I didn’t want to upset you every time I had to leave for duty. I won’t kid you, this is dangerous work, but I love it and I love you. Wish me well during the surgery and soon I will be out of here, good as new.” She doesn’t know the half of it!

Dr. Jeffries returned and Judy walked with slower steps back to the waiting area. Her last words with her husband were in anger. Her mother watched her approach.

“Mom, you’ve known all along and you never said a word?”

“Dear, it wasn’t our place nor John’s. His orders were to keep his duties secret.”

“At least tell me what happened tonight.”

“Dad, John and the local police have been searching for a major drug ring. It seems they were using the cabin as a hiding place for the drugs. It’s been vacant for thirty years, and they never expected anyone to come near it. This may be the break the police need to get a handle on the case.”

A nurse led them to a private room. Judy stared out the window. In the glass, she saw John wheeled in. The orderlies eased him onto the bed and left.

John was still groggy. “Judy?”

She took his hand, not wanting him to talk.

Joan stood. “I’ll go check on Dad.”

“Don’t move.” A man in the doorway aimed a rifle at Joan.

Judy and Joan started to scream. “Shut up or die with that filthy pig over there who killed our Pa!”

The man turned his attention to John. “Hi John, nice seeing you after all these years. Hear you’re some bigwig in the military. You should’ve stuck with us. We have a nice business going and you aren’t going to ruin it.”

_________________

I chose my own prompt in order to keep my story flowing. The suggested one didn’t work for me. It said if we needed a prompt to use the one suggested. I took that to mean that I could choose my own.

Constructive Criticism is appreciated as always.

 The Flight is part 3 of Judy and John. The Honeymoon is part 2 and part 1 is John and Judy.

Now we are adding part 4 The Hospital Under Siege!

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About Tessa

Teresa (Tessa) Smeigh is now in her 60's and still going strong despite her disabilities affecting both physical and mental abilities. She has bipolar disorder (mental), Fibromyalgia (nerves), degenerative disc disease (spine), and arthritis (joints). Despite that she is active in Mental Health Advocating, writing for www.IBPF.org (volunteer for non-profit) and has 5 blog posts already published by them. She is also working on 2 fiction books (mysteries). She keeps her blog filled with useful content, daily devotionals (She is a Christian), stories and poems. Plenty to keep you busy. She has also been interviewed by blogs and had other posts published on many different blogs. She has 3 blogs so far http://www.tessacandoit.com and http://www.finallyawriter.com and http://www.sunnythoughtsandprayers.wordpress.com She is from Deptford, NJ. Her family and blogs keep her busy.
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13 Responses to FRIDAY FICTION with RONOVAN WRITES Prompt Challenge #4 – Judy and John – The Hospital Under Siege – Part 4

  1. Susan says:

    Sounds like you have a novel brewing there. Very good writing. 🙂

    Like

    • Tessa says:

      Thank you! I have written several serial type stories, but only one other actually was novel material and I am working on that too. You are right this might also manage to get to that point.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Ronovan says:

    The story is moving forward at a nice pace. For this piece I would look at more of Show don’t Tell and giving some sense of the passage of time between some of the events. For the Show don’t Tell part you could Show in dialogue and action things like the silence in the ambulance with the mother giving a signal to Judy in some way to indicate not speaking in front of the paramedic.

    Some interesting developments. Will be interesting to see where the government connection comes into play with the story.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Friday Fiction with Ronovan Writes Prompt #4 Entries: THE LINKS | ronovanwrites

  4. Ritu says:

    This is really developing well Tessa!!

    Liked by 1 person

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  8. Pingback: FRIDAY FICTION with RONOVAN WRITES Prompt Challenge #8 – Judy and John – Recovery From Birth | Always A Writer

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